Ah, I see you’ve met someone who isn’t entirely sympathetic or has a very archaic view of a food allergy. It doesn’t matter what point you are at in life or where you are in the world, it’s bound to happen. It’s hard not to get angry and fight fire with fire, but sometimes you have to be the bigger person, count to ten and try your best to explain.
A story: I was recently on a plane heading back to Canada after a wonderful vacation. Being the prepared person that I am, I had informed the airline of my food allergy and was allowed to board early to wipe my seat down and speak with the flight crew. As people began to board (my family included), the flight attendant came over to us and created a sort of buffer zone, informing those around me they had to refrain from ordering or eating anything with peanuts/tree nuts. Great, right? Apparently not, because not even Captain America’s shield could save me from the daggers the woman in front of me was throwing. When the flight attendants came around with the food cart an hour later she tried to order something with tree nuts and was angry when she couldn’t. She turned around and shook her head at me while muttering to herself that people like me shouldn’t fly.
So, what’s the deal with anti-allergy backlash? I’ve had my share (as I’m sure many have) of negative responses and backlash regarding my food allergies. People can be callous or have little respect when it comes to things they don’t understand or don’t want to understand. It’s not something you can control, and it’s not something you wished upon a star for, but people seem to lash out regardless. It might be the restrictions on where you can enjoy your favourite snack or what you can put in your child’s lunchbox for school that has people so upset. The reality is, parents have to deal with the very real reality that a simple food can cause serious harm. Their kids then turn into adults who are hyper aware of their food and surroundings because of this constant threat. Trust me, being an adult with a food allergy is no walk in the park. It leaves me with more questions about my food than the ending of Sixth Sense.
If I can stand on a soapbox for a second, I urge you to cast your doubt and negative feelings aside for people who have little understanding of a food allergy. I instead ask you to extend the olive branch and help them understand the seriousness of a food allergy. Implore them to put themselves in your shoes. Think of yourself at a hockey game, enjoying the rush of a crowd cheering, your favourite player skating down the ice on a breakaway, you catch your breath, not because of the shot, but because from the corner of your eye you see someone eating peanuts and throwing the shells on the floor. Try to imagine the very real and scary aspect of the situation. You ask kindly and respectfully that they refrain from throwing shells or eating beside you. As that person, instead of jumping straight to anger for not being able to enjoy the salty snack, try sympathy for a situation they physically can’t alter or change but you can. You have the opportunity to be the winning player in that game, there may not be a trophy or medal in the end but know that you’ll have the eternal gratitude of someone.
If you’re interested in knowing more about allergy backlash check out the articles below.
– Arianne.KAnxiety, Arianne K., Attitude, communication, flying, parenting, Travel and Allergies